Manuscript Status: FINISHED

Mentor Name: Lindsey Frydman

Mentee Name: Elissa Hunter

Title: VERY CAREFULLY AND NOT ALL AT ONCE

Category: Young Adult

Genre: Contemporary

Word Count: 63,000

Pitch:

Geeky Thea just wants to nab her crush and get her driver’s license, but a hot new guy’s arrival is going to make her junior year more complicated than explaining emotions to a Vulcan.

Excerpt:

There were some things in life I would never understand. How some people thought you could like either Star Wars or Star Trek, but not both. Why chocolate milk gave me the hiccups. And most importantly, why Alan Merkel, über-goth and total hottie biscotti, had yet to fall hopelessly in love with me.

The last of these had been on my mind for months, ever since Alan complimented me at my best friend’s birthday party. As soon as I looked into his so-brown-they-might-as-well-be-black eyes, I was a goner. He haunted my dreams and waking moments. He crept in at the most inconvenient times  like, say, when I was trying to make important purchase decisions in the back of Cool Comix, Northwest Florida’s finest purveyor of geek accoutrements.

“I suck so hard at flirting,” I said to Madison. “What do I have to do to make him notice me?”

“Try actually talking to him, Thea,” she said while browsing through the shelf of trade paperbacks.

“I can’t just go up and talk to him.” I rifled through the one-dollar boxes on the floor. “He’s a guy. I have no experience socializing with them. I’m afraid I might puke all over him. In fact, I know I will. I’ll yack on his combat boots and then I’ll find out if it really is possible to die of humiliation.” I pushed the last box away and stood.

“You’re overthinking this too much. Just chill out and let it happen naturally.”

And there, sitting in the top left corner, was just what I needed to squash my gloom.

Categories: PW Entries

5 Comments

Jessie Devine · November 3, 2017 at 1:18 am

I love this! Please query me and upload the full manuscript here: QueryMe.online/devinequeries/PitchWars

Penelope Burns · November 3, 2017 at 1:00 pm

Hi Elissa,

I would LOVE to see this. Can you send the full to penelope@gelfmanschneider.com, with your query in the body of the email and #PitchWars and title in the subject line? Thanks so much!

Penelope

Quressa Robinson · November 3, 2017 at 3:35 pm

This is totally something I’ve posted about on my MSWL. I’d love to see more. I may not be the only agent here at Nelson Literary Agency who wants to read your amazing work! So, please send just one email to query@nelsonagency.com with PITCH WARS UPLOAD in the subject line. We will reply with our upload instructions, and then all the interested NLA agents will read and consider your manuscript. Thank you!”

Whitley Abell · November 4, 2017 at 1:33 am

YES! I’d love to see more! Please submit your query, synopsis, and first 50 pages to https://querymanager.com/query/inklings_whitley/PitchWars. I can’t wait to dive in!

Christa Heschke · November 6, 2017 at 10:20 pm

I really like the voice and a geek love story is definitely up my alley! I’d be interested to see more. Please send a query, first 50 pages and synopsis to chquery@mcintoshandotis.com. Look forward to reading!
-Christa Heschke, McIntosh & Otis

Comments are closed.