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Auntie B’s Book Club Contest
Semi-finals Post 3
Here is the third post for the semi-finals in the Auntie’s B Book Club Contest, and I love reading the girls’ comments. Having teens tell you what they like or didn’t like about your work is such a wonderful gift. I hope you all gain something out of participating in this blogfest contest. If you wonder what this post is about go here for all the details.
So, next up is . . .
Book Girl: Able to read a book in a day. She’s going back East to college in the fall. She loves all genres! She’s read the Harry Potter series like five times or so. Her favorite genre is anything fantasy. She wanted me to tell you it isn’t about the genre for her, but more about the story and characters.
I remember the first books we read in the Auntie B’s Book Club when we were in fifth grade. My favorites were Harry Potter, The BFG, and The Family Under The Bridge. I think that’s where I really found that I liked reading. We read many series and we’d get all excited before the next books were released. I think we got excited because Auntie B was just as excited as we were. I’m going to miss our book club, but we’ve decided to have a club during the summer months when we’re home, which I’m thrilled about.
I wanted to say that I could see myself picking up all the books from my list by either the pitch or the first 250 words, but there were just a few that pulled me in by both. You all are wonderful writers and I wish you all the best.
My top two . . .
Sarah Nicolas
Title: Dragons Are People Too
Genre: YA Urban Fantasy
Pitch: Sixteen-year-old Kitty is a weredragon operative for the US government. When the government turns its back on the dragons, she must choose between loyalty to her country and allegiance to her family.
Genre: YA Urban Fantasy
Pitch: Sixteen-year-old Kitty is a weredragon operative for the US government. When the government turns its back on the dragons, she must choose between loyalty to her country and allegiance to her family.
You can check out the blog post here: Sarah Nicolas
My comments: The pitch got me excited to read the excerpt, which was so awesome I wanted to read more. When Auntie B told us to look for a voice and what it was, I thought it would be tough to spot a good one but this one totally did it. I loved the voice and the attitude of the main character! Kitty is a strong kick-butt type of girl. So good.
Jamie McHenry
Title: On Fallen Wings
Genre: Fantasy
Pitch: When Rhiannon’s boyfriend is kidnapped, her quest to save him forces her to choose between the Faerie life she loves and losing him forever.
My comments: I love the pitch. I love the excerpt. I love how she describes love to her little sister. Loved it!
My thoughts on the other entries . . .
Sara Riouch
Title: Legacy
Genre: YA Urban Fantasy
Pitch: In a family of witches, Danielle is ordinary. But when a sorcerer tries to kill her brother, she’s the only one who can save him.
Genre: YA Urban Fantasy
Pitch: In a family of witches, Danielle is ordinary. But when a sorcerer tries to kill her brother, she’s the only one who can save him.
My comments: This one was close to being picked as one of my top two. I love the pitch but it wasn’t different enough for me. The excerpt is great and it kept my attention. I would most definitely buy it because of the first page.
Michael Di Gesu
Title: Amber and the Whispering Willows
Genre: M/G fantasy
Pitch: A plague is unleashed into the human and fairy realms by an evil fae from the fairy underworld. Born with a gift of the winds, eleven-year-old Amber is their only hope for survival.
My comments: The pitch is interesting and I would open the book up to read the first page. The excerpt didn’t pull me in enough. I think you should start with something bigger instead of with Amber getting dressed for ballet and thinking about the Willows. I’d work on making Amber’s thoughts more age appropriate.
Auntie B’s note: After discussing this with Book Girl, by bigger she means you should start with action. Have something exciting happen to Amber right off to pull your reader in.
Eliza Tilton
Title: Broken Forest: A Keening Blade Novel
Genre: YA Fantasy
Pitch: Avikar always dreamed of exploring Tarrtainya; he never imagined it would be in search of his sister.
You can check out the blog post here: Eliza Tilton
My comments: The pitch is too short and doesn’t give me enough to know what this story is about. The first page is awesome and I could really imagine Avikar’s home.
Cholisose
Title: Four Nights a Day
You can check out the blog post here: Cholisose
Christina Mercer
Genre: YA Fantasy
Pitch: A young shaman named Kil Cho-Hei is all alone—everyone else in the world has vanished. She journeys the quiet landscape to find other survivors, her identity, and the meaning behind the dreamlike phenomena she encounters.
You can check out the blog post here: Cholisose
My comments: The beginning of the pitch is very interesting but I didn’t get the last part. Is she in a dream? The excerpt was really good and I wanted to find out what was happening and why she was so uncaring. I like the added touch of her skipping and twirling a pink paper parasol that showed she wasn’t worrying about the world ending. It’s all very strange in a good way.
Christina Mercer
Title: Arrow of the Mist
Genre: YA Fantasy
Pitch: Saving her beloved father is all 15-year-old Lia hopes to do after barbed roots emerge from the woods and attack him, until Lia learns the person she reveres the most is behind the murderous roots.
You can check out the blog post here: Christina Mercer
My comments: I was confused with the pitch and didn’t get the barbed roots. I did totally love the excerpt. So good. I would pick this up in the book store because of it.
Jenny Keller Ford
Title: In the Shadow of the Dragon King
Genre: YA Fantasy with romantic and urban fantasy elements
Pitch: A millionaire teen and his ‘girl’ friend are thrust into a magical world poised on the brink of war, and must battle a vengeful dragon and a murdering sorcerer if they are to return home.
You can check out the blog post here: Jenny Keller Ford
My comments: The pitch didn’t catch my attention. I did enjoy reading the excerpt, but it seems unbelievable for a fifteen year old to have access to money like that. Doesn’t a trust, a lawyer, or their parents handle the money? I loved the dialogue between David and Charlotte.
Rebecca Enzor
Title: Fie Eoin
Genre: YA/NA Fantasy
Pitch: When her sister is sold into slavery, Kindra must fight to win her back. But their chief’s betrayal runs deeper than she imagined, and Kindra must choose between saving her sister and saving the tribe.
You can check out the blog post here: Rebecca Enzor
My comments: The pitch is so good it would totally make me turn to the first page. The first page is so good, the only thing lacking is how she is feeling. She only digs her fingers into the rock and grits her teeth. How does the whip feel when it hits her and how painful is it?
Stephanie Mooney
Title: Aurora and the Signet Ring
Genre: YA Fantasy
Pitch: Aurora has no patience for faerytales. But when Thorion, the Starish prince of Lasseren, enlists her to help him save the kingdom from a dark enchantment, she must learn to embrace the magic that surrounds her.
You can check out the blog post here: Stephanie Mooney
My comments: The pitch is so awesome. I’d buy the book on that alone. The excerpt was slow for me. It really picked up in the second part when Norin is racing through the forest to find his daughter. The writing is so good.
Daniel Moore
Title: Chemicaust
Genre: Sci-Fi/Steampunk, Short Story
Pitch: What might men do with unlimited power? And what might they allow to be done? Chem is the Mad Element. It is a blessing and a curse with as many names as shades and hues.
Genre: Sci-Fi/Steampunk, Short Story
Pitch: What might men do with unlimited power? And what might they allow to be done? Chem is the Mad Element. It is a blessing and a curse with as many names as shades and hues.
My comments: The pitch is excellent. The excerpt is very good and I loved the uniqueness of this one. The only thing I found that was off for me was when it flickers to dark and he knows what the rats are gnawing on and that the sand is gray. How can he see that in the dark?
I’ll have the final post for the semi-finals posted tomorrow morning. Also, the winners will be announced August 3rd at 8PM EST. So come back and check it out.
8 Comments
Sarah Nicolas · August 2, 2011 at 11:23 pm
This comment has been removed by the author.
Sarah Nicolas · August 2, 2011 at 11:35 pm
Yay! I’m SOOO excited she liked Dragons! And to receive compliments on the voice from my intended audience is even sweeter. 🙂
Thanks!
Jamie McHenry · August 3, 2011 at 12:44 am
Thank you. Hooray for feedback!
Georgia Summers · August 3, 2011 at 5:03 am
Is it just me, or have a lot of people written with traditional fantasy elements in mind? I’ve never seen so many dragons and sorcerers before.
Michael Di Gesu · August 3, 2011 at 7:01 am
Congrats on the finalists….
Thanks Book Girl for your comment. I appreciate the feedback. Thanks Brenda.
rebeccaenzor · August 3, 2011 at 9:49 am
Thanks for the feedback, Book Girl! Glad you liked it 🙂
Robin Weeks · August 3, 2011 at 12:27 pm
Thanks for your comments on everyone’s pitches, Book Girl! I’m learning so much!
jennykellerford · August 3, 2011 at 8:57 pm
Thank you, Book Girl for your comments!!! You’ve given me an idea on how to change something I hadn’t noticed before. I’m stoked you liked the rest of the excerpt. Good luck at school!
Comments are closed.